I'm a registered independent so I don't get to vote in primaries. Nor do I want to. I like choosing between the lesser of two evils and the primaries complicate that by adding multiple evils and probably a good as well.
So Arlen Specter lost and there's various theories as to why. He lost because democrats are smarter than republicans. He thought he could just switch sides and no one would notice. We on the left are a little sharper than that, thank you very much. Conservatives may buy that bullshit, but not us! Look at people like Hootie (I don't know his real name) or Jewel or Bon Jovi! They're considered jokes by most music fans, so they suddenly become country (a musical genre closely linked with conservatism) and the country scene is like "Hey look at these country folk!" We do not roll that way. Arlen Specter is evil. I used to know why. Really I did. I remember being outraged at the things he did, but during the Bush years I was outraged so often I can't keep track of why....
ANYWAY! You don't just get to be evil and the suddenly think that no one will remember. This is why Arlen Specter lost. He was an asshole and people just remembered that. That's all! No big lesson to learn.
Something I don't understand about the Pakistani terrorist NYC Times Square guy. His fertilizer wasn't the kind that blew up. So he essentially made a stinky piece of nothing. I don't get it. How is this illegal? And I read that he had "quirky" habits, such as jogging at night in dark clothing. I do this! This isn't quirky! It's the time to go jogging or walking! There's nothing open, nothing on TV, nothing to miss by just going outside. What's quirky are the fucking people who get up at 4 AM to do it!
J: My pardon; did I break thy concentration? Continue! Ah, but now thy tongue is still. Allow me then to offer a response. Describe Marsellus Wallace to me, pray. B: What? J: What country dost thou hail from? B: What? J: How passing strange, for I have traveled far, And never have I heard tell of this What. What language speak they in the land of What? B: What? J: The Queen's own English, base knave, dost thou speak it? B: Aye! J: Then hearken to my words and answer them! Describe to me Marsellus Wallace! B: What? JULES presses his knife to BRETT's throat J: Speak 'What' again! Thou cur, cry 'What' again! I dare thee utter 'What' again but once! I dare thee twice and spit upon thy name! Now, paint for me a portraiture in words, If thou hast any in thy head but 'What', Of Marsellus Wallace! B: He is dark. J: Aye, and what more? B: His head is shaven bald. J: Has he the semblance of a harlot? B: What? JULES strikes and BRETT cries out J: Has he the semblance of a harlot? B: Nay! J: Then why didst thou attempt to bed him thus? B: I did not! J: Aye, thou didst! O, aye, thou didst! Thou hoped to rape him like a chattel whore, And sooth, Lord Wallace is displeased to bed With anyone but she to whom he wed.
I wish I could tell the difference between a detour and a complete closing of a route. I don't know if I should give up on music as a career. There's so much frustration involved. I don't know if I enjoy it. I didn't have fun on the last tour I did at all. In fact, it was the first time I felt lonely since I was 13 years old. It was THAT bad.
This situation is never mentioned anywhere. I've read everything about the music industry I could get my hands on and this was not covered. I never pictured losing the drummer and bringing the entire band to a screeching halt. Just sitting around for 6 months with my thumb up my ass. I work at a Hallmark store. For what? Right now it seems like I made so many sacrifices for nothing. Nobody ever says that if you follow your heart you can fucking fail and fail big. Nobody ever says you can give your blood, sweat and tears to something and no one will give a fuck. No one will give you any sort of reward.
So what do I do now? Give up? Press on? I work full time, live at home, and I'm broke. I'm less than broke. I'm 24 years old and I keep having to borrow money from my dad. I'm fucking sick of this. What the fuck do I do?